Last week I ran a workshop with a group of powerful women on the coast of California.
It was titled “Dream It. Plan It. Crush It. A workshop for women who want to do just that.”
The feedback has been so positive that I wanted to dedicate the next three blog posts to share clear steps to get you on your way to livin’ the DPC.
Today we’re starting with The Dream. Not just visualizing it. But owning it. Screen printing the details, making a t-shirt, wearing it every freakin’ day, and giving them away on the corner for everyone to witness the greatness. That’s the kind of dreaming I’m talking about.
All the self-helpery one can buy can’t tell you what your dream looks like. Everyone dreams differently, but once you see it—the vision that makes you excited and a little bit uncomfortable—that’s the one. Before you scare it away, or it scares you away, here are three tips towards OWNING your dream.
1. Write it down, people! And then read it with your eyes and your brain. Look at the words you are choosing to explain the details of your dream. Then sign the bottom of the page as if you are signing a document into law. Own the fact that this idea, this dream, this vision—it’s yours. Here’s an example for you. Kate Spade started by sewing her own labels to the outside of her handbags and exhibiting at trade shows. She was literally owning her dream on the outside of every bag for all to see, by literally putting her name on it. Talk about ownership. I think it worked out pretty well for her.
2. Verbalize! Anunciate! Exercise your vocal chords while exercising your right to dream. Look in the mirror and with your most “I’m not messing around” voice, succinctly explain your dream to yourself like an elevator speech. Record yourself with Voice Memo on your iphone and listen to it in the car on the way to work. Hear your own voice and let your brain get to know how your dream sounds. Vocal coach John Sugden teaches that the best way to memorize lines is to say them five different ways with completely different emotions. I did this to prepare for my DPC workshop and it totally works. Try saying a motivational speech like you just saw your pet gerbil get run over by a truck and you’ll never forget it. Don’t forget your dream. Would you want it to forget you?
3. Communicate your dream to a human. So you’ve done everything to ensure that you, the dreamer, understands and believes the dream. You’ve verbalized it to the mirror, you’ve verbalized it to your cat, who does his best to feign interest.. Now it’s time to get some human support. I picked up on an exercise from listening to the Pivot Podcast, by life coach Jenny Blake. It’s called a 30/30. I do this exercise three times a month with three different women in my life who I see as mover/shakers. Women whose feedback I trust and value. Another common thread amongst these women? They aren’t afraid to be bold. In other words, they will voice their opinion without hesitation, even if it differs from my own. A 30/30 is an hour long conversation where half an hour is dedicated to one person’s dreams, visions, plans of action, and feelings about it all. And the next half hour, you guessed it, is devoted to the other partner. These calls have been where some of my most hidden dreams have unearthed themselves, and have also been opportunities for me to see areas of improvement in my work and practice. 30/30’s give me a chance to support others by giving the gift of my time, energy, support, and feedback. They could very easily be called win/win’s. This is low-risk, high impact stuff here, folks. Do these exercises every day for the next two weeks and turn them into habits.
The not so secret secret:
Sometimes the easiest place to start is #3: Communicate your dream to a human, because it comes with built in accountability. Pick up the phone, or e-mail that person who came to mind when you read the above. Pick a date. Commit. Dream. Support. Rinse. Repeat.